Sometime last night while I was in Cleavland to go to Cleavland Clinic to see my doctor....my Australian Shepard dog Samantha died in her sleep. Here is a picture of her [link] .When Dawn (the lady who was taking care of my house and animals while I was away) went down into the basement to let Samantha and the other dogs out she found Samantha laying against the wall at the bottom of the stairs with her legs in the air like she always liked to sleep dead. She called my Aunt Deanna and my aunt called me while I was just getting out of the shower in my hotel room. I was hysterical. My aunt's husband Guy is a funeral director. He went to my house and he and Dawn put Samantha inside a body bag and brought her to their funeral home morgue since my mom and I wanted to see her before she was taken to be cremated. When we came home we stopped by the funeral home first and my aunt and uncle weren't home yet. Michael my uncle's employee was there though and got Samantha out for us in the Funeral Home basement. By that time my stomach had been churning and I was afraid to see her but wanted to say good-bye still. When I saw her I was shaking all over and crying. I held her like I always did and pet her favorite spot on her nose. I ended up crying so hard I fainted and Michael had to bring me back to conciousness and take me outside. My eyes are raw and sore...I'm hurting....I just cannot beleive it happened. I had four dogs and I thought our oldest, our Pug Binkie was going to go first and the last one to go would be Sammy. I was wrong. My uncle told me she had died of a heart attack and gone in her sleep which gives me some peice of mind but...I wish I could have been there beside her.....I wish I didn't have to go to Cleavland...I almost lost her last year but I got her to the emergency vet just in time. That was back last year April 5th...the same day my father had died back in 2002. She was his dog but I wanted her to stay with me because she my last reminder...my last peice of my dad. And now she's gone.... I'm bawling just typing this out...so much has happened over these past few years..I just need to go lay down.. Please do not tell me she is in a better place. Her place was here at the foot of my bed or on my couch beside me..


Good-Bye Samantha. I'll miss you so much and I'll see you when its my time...



"High time we made a stand and shook up the views of the common man."
-Tears For Fears


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